Aaron Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Lower your expectations and I will totally amaze you.
←Rate | 02-02-2012 16:35 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I'd hit that" -old people who drive
←Rate | 03-14-2013 16:55 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can lead a human to knowledge.... but you can't make them think.
←Rate | 03-20-2013 13:46 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's really hard raising a child by yourself, I don't know how my T.V. does it.
←Rate | 11-02-2010 14:26 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon all I want is a warm bed, a kind word and unlimited power.
←Rate | 02-28-2010 21:02 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
←Rate | 03-16-2010 15:40 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thats the last time I ever sleep with an elementary teacher. I woke up with a great job sticker on my stomach.
←Rate | 03-09-2013 00:35 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I tried exercise but I was allergic to it. My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. Very dangerous.
←Rate | 07-23-2012 01:39 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do what you love, but run like hell as soon as you hear the sirens.
←Rate | 08-12-2012 18:30 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're annoying, but honestly, I've been annoyed by better.
←Rate | 03-11-2013 17:50 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Karma cafe has no menus. You get served what you deserve.
←Rate | 06-22-2012 21:34 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Come on, dude. Grow a pear.” - farmer to a barren tree
←Rate | 03-01-2011 13:40 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon The brain has around 100 billion neurons in it. Makes you think
←Rate | 09-10-2012 12:43 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon No one can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it.
←Rate | 10-20-2010 09:10 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Shout out to the post office for delivering my recycling to me every day.
←Rate | 09-29-2016 22:34 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have no problem with you speaking your mind,,, as long as you can do it with your mouth closed.
←Rate | 09-20-2012 09:24 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Homeless people have been known to step outside the box.
←Rate | 10-17-2012 22:04 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon I rate that sharks circle before attacking because humans taste better without sh*t in them.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 08:27 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1990: call me on the new line in my room 2000: call me on my mobile flip phone 2015: don't call me
←Rate | 03-26-2016 14:34 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon My credit card company called. They want me to leave home without it.
←Rate | 11-15-2010 09:17 by Aaron Comments (0)  




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