Funny Status Messages for Facebook
A huge collection of status updates for your facebook, twitter, or myspace profiles.Become a fan of Tjshome.com on Facebook
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X says
everyone hs photographic memory, some just don't hv th film
X
had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture
X says
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life
X
got some new underwear today... well new to me anyway :-)
X is
so lazy, she'll fight that little stone in my shoe till the end of the day.
X is
so lazy, she'll fight that little stone in her shoe till the end of the day
X says
lets play guess who I am? ok here we go, My arm itches, my neck itches, I'm shaking, and my lips are ashy. What am I?
X
I had an appointment at the sperm bank today, but I had to call up to say I couldn't come.
X
: Ahhh, fall is is the air... and on my lawn, and on my car, and on my driveway...
X is
the Dread Pirate Roberts.
X
got his chocolate in your peanut butter.
X
hears the call of a lonely Crown Royal bottle. It's OK little buddy, I'll keep you company...
X
: Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat...
X
: What's Klingon for "I'm going to die a virgin?"
X is
Never shave your legs when you have goosebumps. I'm just sayin'.
X is
never playing truth or dare again...
X is
rated MA for a mature audience, he contains coarse language, some nudity and adult themes
X has
got to live every week like it's shark week.
X is
Fun fact: if you leave a bag of lettuce in the fridge long enough, it will turn into brown soup.
X says
63 notifications later..i regret "liking" your status
