Mickey Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
←Rate | 01-17-2017 13:00 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm the proud grandfather of a new baby boy. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
←Rate | 01-17-2017 13:02 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Many people are afraid of heights. Not me, though. I'm afraid of widths.
←Rate | 01-17-2017 13:05 by Mickey Comments (1)  


   messageicon The only thing to believe in is to not believe in anything.
←Rate | 01-17-2017 23:03 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd be all for the Women's March protest if they added, "off a cliff" to the name of the event.
←Rate | 01-20-2017 07:47 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel an originality rush coming on. Think I'll make a dog face on Snapchat.
←Rate | 01-23-2017 10:41 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm really not a "know it all"... For instance, up until recently, I thought cunnilingus was an Irish Airline.
←Rate | 01-23-2017 10:52 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon n't the bigger question: How many people attended the Hillary Inauguration?
←Rate | 01-24-2017 03:46 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm in a book store and a liberal clerk helped me. I asked for the new Trump book on his immigration policy. She said, "F-you! Get out and stay out! I go, "Yes, that's it, do you have it in paperback?"
←Rate | 01-25-2017 10:08 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I were an actual snowflake, ie the feathery ice crystal with a sixfold symmetry, I'd be highly insulted.
←Rate | 01-26-2017 08:05 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon I lost my virginity when I was 15. It was smokin' hot until I bit her thigh and all the air leaked out.
←Rate | 01-26-2017 10:51 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon If Trump is AIDS in human form, then Obama is the a$$hole he got it from.
←Rate | 01-26-2017 11:34 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon This country needed a good weeding out. And Trump is the one who brought the weed whacker.
←Rate | 01-27-2017 13:20 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's the difference between a druggist and a drug dealer? One sells drugs LEGALLY. What's the difference between an immigrant who came to the US lawfully, and one who snuck in? One's here LEGALLY. See?
←Rate | 01-28-2017 15:15 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon What bothers me most about liberal women, is that none of them are hot enough to be this stupid.
←Rate | 01-29-2017 13:15 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember the protests back in 2011 when Obama stopped the Iraqi refugees from entering the States for six months? Neither do I.
←Rate | 01-30-2017 08:22 by Mickey Comments (3)  


   messageicon Canada: Compared to the USA, it's the North American equivalent to the kids' table at a holiday dinner.
←Rate | 01-30-2017 12:35 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon South Americans. They gave the world coffee and tomatoes. It was all downhill from there.
←Rate | 01-30-2017 12:43 by Mickey Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do President Trump and Tony the Tiger have in common? They're both orange and make things GREEAAT!
←Rate | 01-31-2017 07:57 by Mickey Comments (2)  


   messageicon I wish people would stop saying the husbands of the women who marched didn't get a sandwich that day. Have you seen those women? No way any of them have a husband.
←Rate | 01-31-2017 09:59 by Mickey Comments (0)  



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