easter OR bunny Funny Status Messages

   I'm excited this Easter to eat like the 1% and drink like the 99%.

   So looking forward to all the Easter weekend mattress sales.

   "Dress for the job you want, not the job you have." Oops, I'm now sitting at my work's disciplinary meeting dressed as the Easter Bunny.

   Easter Pro Tip: Wrap up grapes in color foil and give them away as chocolate eggs to your family and friends.

   As an Easter present, wrap grapes in color foil and send a basket of them to the IRS.

   My goal for Easter weekend is to move just enough each day to make sure no one thinks I'm dead.

   In the spirit of spring cleaning and Easter, I've decided to keep the dust bunnies as decorations.

   I am wondering what type of Easter eggs they are eating this weekend at Trump rallies....

   He came hopping out of nowhere... I nearly spilled my beer, while I was driving along texting with the radio cranked up. Suddenly, I seen a flash of gray followed up with a "thump-thump!" Anyway Happy Easter! Sorry if you didn't get anything, my bad.

   And then the imaginary Easter Bunny said "put that obscene picture on Facebook. It's hilarious"... But the Easter Bunny was wrong. So very wrong. According to the HR department.

   Wondering if there's any good Easter egg hunts to bring the kids to two days after Easter?

   Coworkers, let me know if you'd like to join me for lunch at my desk eating discounted Easter chocolate.

   I saw a bald eagle carry away a bunny rabbit today, and I was like, "well, at least somebody gets to be held."

   BREAKING: Trump cancels annual Easter Egg Roll, claims he "doesn't care for Chinese food".

   Already rolling my eyes in preparation for the 4/20 snap chats I get on Easter.

   Oh good YouPorn put up all their Easter themed porn.

   One time in 6th grade me and my friend got to an Easter egg hunt early and switched all the candy in the eggs with mustard and ketchup.

   There’s no such thing as a non-terrifying Easter bunny costume.

   In the spirit of spring cleaning and Easter, I'm keeping the dust bunnies as decorations.

   Easter egg hunts are fun but, some kids always get their eggs stolen by others. Also, I'm not allowed on the field this year.