Slickpony Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon "Hello 911?" "Someone just stole my status on Facebook....yes, I'll hold"....
←Rate | 02-08-2013 00:34 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Can't You Just Let Me Watch The Damn Football Game?" ~~ the Working Title of my new Childrens book, probably....
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:08 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon so....I just got a Booty Call from Life....apparently it still wants to keep screwing me.... :(
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:06 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon ‎"Dijon found himself spread upon a bed of lettuce, atop a thin slice of turkey breast....enveloped by steamy buns....garnished with a sweet, crisp pickle...." ~~ Excerpt from my new book "50 SHADES OF GREY POUPON"....
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:06 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon Look here Dora....If you ever want to see your monkey friend again you are gonna stick these condoms full of heroin in your ass and get them through customs....
←Rate | 07-13-2012 18:27 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon It picks the movie out quickly from the Redbox or it gets the hose again....you stupid b!tch....
←Rate | 07-13-2012 18:26 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon so....I often joke that my wife is too fat for sex....I call her 'Missionary Impossible'....
←Rate | 07-12-2012 23:50 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon so....I've decided I'm going to write the first Gangsta Rap adaptation of Winnie-The-Pooh....I'm gonna call it 'Tigga Please'....
←Rate | 04-24-2012 17:07 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon you know....they say one in every four men are gay....so there must be one in my group of friends.....I hope it's Michael, 'cuz he's super cute....
←Rate | 04-23-2012 15:10 by Slickpony Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I want you to tongue punch your fart box" ~~ my worst pick-up line ever, probably....
←Rate | 02-24-2012 23:58 by Slickpony Comments (0)  



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