Maureen Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon surprised that Kate and William didn't go with my suggested royal baby name of Princess Consuela Bananahammock!
←Rate | 05-04-2015 14:36 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon may not have the best parenting skills; but, in my defense, my kids don't have the best childing skills, either.
←Rate | 10-04-2014 12:32 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon recovering from this long work day with my friend, Char...donnay!
←Rate | 05-05-2014 21:17 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon wonders why we can't just all get a Long....Island Iced Tea?!?
←Rate | 05-02-2014 19:48 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Note to self: you never read these notes, so stop writing them.
←Rate | 06-24-2013 20:34 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon UPS delivery guys don't like it when you go up to their truck and order an ice cream sandwich and a bomb pop.
←Rate | 06-24-2013 20:31 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever my children question my knowledge on any subject, I just remind them that their mother is older than the Internet.
←Rate | 04-25-2013 21:11 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon gets the feeling that I need coffee more than coffee will ever need me.
←Rate | 03-06-2013 08:07 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys - A few words of wisdom...when a woman asks for your opinion, she doesn't want to hear your "actual" opinion, she simply wants to hear her opinion in a deeper voice.
←Rate | 03-04-2013 20:20 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon would imagine there really isn't any market for sea shells down by the sea shore considering the abundance of free sea shells.
←Rate | 02-04-2013 07:55 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some of the best decisions I’ve ever made involved me clicking cancel - instead of send.
←Rate | 01-29-2013 10:13 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon hurt my leg while sleeping last night in case you're wondering how I'd do running a marathon.
←Rate | 01-29-2013 10:12 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon freely admits that I don't know how to play Minesweeper - I just click random boxes hoping I'm right.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 23:53 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before you judge Mitt Romney, try walking a mile in his backyard.
←Rate | 10-20-2012 11:54 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon makes a mean cup of coffee! This one just told me I'm not as funny as I think I am.
←Rate | 09-23-2012 19:09 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon The side effects of the medicine I just took include nausea, nausea, nausea, nausea, nausea, repeating things four times & difficulty adding.
←Rate | 09-23-2012 19:06 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let me put things into perspective for you....persp(things)ective....​you're welcome!
←Rate | 08-20-2012 21:13 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not all that glitters is gold. Take, for instance, glitter.
←Rate | 08-13-2012 22:24 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon can't understand why Victoria's Secret incorrectly refers to these "wine-drinking, recliner pants" I'm wearing as "yoga pants."
←Rate | 08-13-2012 19:21 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just saw that I have one unheard message and I didn't even see my phone ring. I hope it's not work-related or Mel Gibson!
←Rate | 08-13-2012 09:10 by Maureen Comments (0)  


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