Crewz Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon You've already put up your Christmas tree? That's nothing. I'm already drunk for St. Patrick's Day.
←Rate | 10-18-2018 03:28 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have come to the conclusion, that dryer lint is the cremated remains of all of my missing socks.
←Rate | 07-01-2018 02:27 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife just told me that I need to grow up. I was speechless, but it is kinda hard to talk with 45 Gummie Bears in your mouth.
←Rate | 05-16-2018 07:25 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just scrolled so far back on Facebook's Timeline it logged me back onto MySpace
←Rate | 05-15-2018 06:35 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yesterday evening on 60 Minutes was the first time for a lot of men that they didn’t have to verify that they were over the age of 18 before they seen Stormy Daniels.
←Rate | 03-26-2018 07:16 by Crewz Comments (1)  


   messageicon Apple is looking to expand its market share among Latinos. No word yet on the release date of their newest device, the iCaramba.
←Rate | 02-15-2018 20:14 by Crewz Comments (1)  


   messageicon The difference between the company I work for and a cactus plant is that the plant has pricks on the OUTSIDE.
←Rate | 02-15-2018 04:44 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm pretty apathetic, so I'm getting a tattoo that says "Shrug Life"
←Rate | 02-14-2018 20:53 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think the spork would have caught on better if they called it "a forkin' spoon!"
←Rate | 02-05-2018 10:45 by Crewz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to take a moment to thank my skeletal system for being so supportive all these years.
←Rate | 02-05-2018 07:46 by Crewz Comments (0)  



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