eaglet1122 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Tomorrow is the end? Then I call "SHOTGUN"!!
←Rate | 05-20-2011 23:17 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon For Sale: New Nunchucks. Will consider trading for a bag of ice and a new set of marbles.
←Rate | 06-10-2011 01:37 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today I made sushi at home for the first time. I subsituted a hotdog for the raw tuna, a bun for the rice, and mustard for the wasabi!
←Rate | 06-14-2010 10:23 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes, in my world 2+2=5 because I like to add a little extra to make it interesting.
←Rate | 01-20-2011 13:49 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just returned a Rug Dr to Lowes. When asked if it worked ok I responded, "Yep got up all the blood and evidence as promised. I would recommend it to anyone"!
←Rate | 09-22-2010 11:52 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ‎20-30 years from now, one of the hardest things our kids will be faced with is finding a screen name which is not already taken!
←Rate | 11-29-2011 00:02 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When they say all expenses paid, does that include bail?
←Rate | 01-03-2012 17:30 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Serving Size: Serves six adults or one ten year old.
←Rate | 10-20-2011 09:37 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If there's one thing I've learned since becoming a father it's just because the kids say they don't want any bacon, make 2 extra slices, because they are lying.
←Rate | 08-28-2011 12:30 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The devil and I go way back. It all started that day we were playing with matches!
←Rate | 10-30-2010 11:27 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have just finished my thesis: "Pyrotechnics Lead to prosthetics". Keep all your digits safe! Happy 4th!!
←Rate | 07-04-2010 21:58 by eaglet1122 Comments (1)  


   messageicon ‎"Your Status has expired. Please deposit $1.25". ~FB Meter Maid
←Rate | 03-06-2011 10:02 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was Home School Valedictorian!
←Rate | 03-15-2011 19:21 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am currently putting together a workout video called "8 Year Abs"
←Rate | 05-28-2011 16:40 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hit "Like" if you're tired of everyone on Facebook telling you to hit "Like."
←Rate | 07-02-2012 09:20 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon AD for PAPER DELIVERY PERSON: Must like early mornings, must own beater car/truck with squealing breaks and NO muffler or sound supression what so ever!! Ability to drive with one knee a plus!!
←Rate | 07-20-2010 09:25 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Find your little island of "OK" in a vast sea of "Holy crap!"
←Rate | 06-19-2012 21:03 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should not clean a gun while loaded....Unless you're wiping off fingerprints!!
←Rate | 11-14-2010 19:24 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The older and fatter I get the more my underwear makes me feel like a dolphin trapped in a tuna net.
←Rate | 05-23-2012 23:26 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What makes me so funny? My strict diet of sunshine and unicorn meat!
←Rate | 01-11-2011 15:04 by eaglet1122 Comments (1)  



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