Jerry Carter Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon My credit score is so bad I have started receiving pre-declined credit card offers!
←Rate | 07-12-2016 16:38 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have an electric stove, but I prefer acoustic. The proceeding random thought was for all my musician friends........
←Rate | 07-20-2016 09:57 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bad reaction to medication. I will never buy my meds from the trunk of a Buick again!
←Rate | 03-06-2012 09:45 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon We were so close, I never noticed I had been deleted as a friend.
←Rate | 01-20-2012 10:54 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had no idea Baltimore had won any type of championship!!!!
←Rate | 04-28-2015 09:22 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can only put the wheels on a wagon so many times, then it's time for a new wagon!
←Rate | 01-20-2012 09:16 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Heading to the pawn shop. We have an extra 5 gallons of gas and gonna make some money!
←Rate | 03-23-2012 09:34 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wow, I just melted a piece of ice by staring at it. Took a little longer than I thought it would.
←Rate | 03-12-2012 21:17 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want to know anything, come over to my house...my wife apparently knows everything.
←Rate | 01-24-2012 09:25 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I watched some of the debate last night...I kept on waiting for someone to say "Live from New York it's Saturday Nite"!!!!! But it never happened.....
←Rate | 10-10-2016 14:16 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's so hot outside, Our hummingbirds are demanding red gatorade!
←Rate | 06-28-2012 18:34 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Are you tired of wal-mart rushing our holiday's? I can't believe it, They already have birthday cards out and it's still months away from my birthday!!!!
←Rate | 06-05-2016 08:50 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon It is so hot, and I have typed so much, I am having to dunk my fingers in gatorade to keep them from cramping!
←Rate | 07-01-2012 14:25 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well it appears coming soon to a store near you...The Morning After Pill. Marketed in fun filled colors and your favorite cartoon characters. You can choose from flintstone, gummy bear, buggs bunny, or any of your favorite Disney characters...
←Rate | 05-01-2013 11:08 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Makeup, soda, sandwich, texting, talking, then I realized she was driving the car in front of me, in traffic.
←Rate | 01-22-2012 13:10 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon My bank account has been hacked....The hacker felt so sorry for me, he sent me a message and has started a gofundme page......
←Rate | 08-05-2016 13:17 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I watched the Olympics last night....I first watched competitive house remodeling, then Cooking with the nuwave oven, and finally finished the evening off with what I thought was going to be open water shark vacuuming....Olympics have sure changed...
←Rate | 08-11-2016 15:02 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think The Timeline went a bit too far when it posted a photo of me being conceived!!!!!
←Rate | 05-04-2012 08:19 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon Zombies are dropping dead all over Washington, and other state capitals. Reports by foxnews say they are starving to death, due to no significant brain tissue in these areas!!!
←Rate | 09-18-2012 13:28 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  


   messageicon I watched the news reports on what was going on in Chicago!!!! I had no idea Trump won the playoffs!!!!
←Rate | 03-12-2016 11:07 by Jerry Carter Comments (0)  



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