J. BIAZA Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Be careful when it comes to reincarnation…. one time I asked to be a singer and I spent 30 years as a sewing machine.
←Rate | 06-09-2011 12:29 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I think that life is one big test...and I'm in the wrong classroom.
←Rate | 04-13-2011 22:53 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon You'd think that after all these years of practice I'd be good at waking up by now.
←Rate | 05-17-2011 09:35 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Dominos Pizza, gotta question. After I rate your food directly on the box do you review the results from my garbage can?
←Rate | 05-26-2011 11:07 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always say the things better left unsaid.
←Rate | 06-27-2011 13:09 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw a sign on the door of a Wal-Mart that said “It is illegal to set off fireworks inside the building.” I really wish I had been there on the day they decided it was necessary to post that.
←Rate | 06-23-2011 14:48 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Apparently dyslexia is not a good excuse for driving 53 in a 35.
←Rate | 06-13-2011 11:13 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon It bothers me when I see tax money wasted on signs telling deer where to cross the road.
←Rate | 07-01-2011 10:29 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know about y'all but every time I see that Direct TV commercial...I really want a miniature giraffe.
←Rate | 04-13-2011 17:02 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cleavage is something you can look down on and approve of at the same time.
←Rate | 05-23-2011 18:10 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am on hold. My call is important to them.
←Rate | 04-21-2011 10:39 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know my limits. I don't pay any attention to them, but I know them.
←Rate | 06-27-2011 13:10 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're her boyfriend?! That's cool! I'm her manfriend!
←Rate | 06-14-2011 10:08 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've had to cancel my impotence clinic appointment. Something's come up.
←Rate | 06-22-2011 12:39 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Watching depression medication commercials makes me depressed. I'm just glad herpes commercials don't have the same effect.
←Rate | 07-01-2011 11:06 by J. BIAZA Comments (1)  


   messageicon Insanity means never having to say “I'm Guilty”.
←Rate | 06-21-2011 21:58 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Health plans are like hospital gowns…You only think you're covered.
←Rate | 05-25-2011 16:21 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thought I was having deja-vu but it turns out I do the exact same things every day
←Rate | 06-16-2011 13:40 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon A smile is like tight underwear…it makes your cheeks go up.
←Rate | 06-15-2011 15:35 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  


   messageicon There has gotta be a better use for the part of my brain that remembers all the words to 'Baby Got Back'.
←Rate | 04-08-2011 17:27 by J. BIAZA Comments (0)  




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