nfl OR football OR superbowl Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I'm holding cheerleader try outs for my "Fantasy football team". Full outfits are encourage but not necessary.
←Rate | 09-18-2018 06:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dearest Neighbors, Please do NOT call the police, it’s not domestic violence or a wild party. It’s football season, that’s just me screaming at my TV.
←Rate | 09-10-2018 06:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When Jimmy Garoppolo said he watches a lot of film, I thought it was talking about football
←Rate | 07-26-2018 10:01 by Kado Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yay! Now I can go back to saying the word "Soccer" without some pretentious fan reminding me that it's referred to as "Football" in other parts of the world.
←Rate | 07-15-2018 15:43 Comments (7)  


   messageicon If football games begin with a kick-off, why don't hockey games begin with a puck-off?
←Rate | 05-28-2018 06:55 Comments (3)  


   messageicon Sometimes I watch football holding an X-Box controller just to confuse people.
←Rate | 05-26-2018 14:32 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men at 20 play football, at 40 tennis, at 60 golf. Notice as they get older their balls get smaller.
←Rate | 03-27-2018 23:15 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Tide commercials during the Superbowl were not a hit with older folks but the kids are them up
←Rate | 02-05-2018 07:43 by MrSharp Comments (1)  


   messageicon College football is important but a college education is importanter!
←Rate | 01-02-2018 13:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Players of the Houston Texans football team took a knee during the national anthem Sunday. That...is...awesome!
←Rate | 10-30-2017 13:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who are the fallen soldiers more mad at (1) Football players who take a knee or (2) A sellout who hands over the presidency of America to Russian control?
←Rate | 10-30-2017 11:59 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Uh, rah rah baseball people. Football season's begun. More You can stop now. Thanks.
←Rate | 09-13-2017 17:02 by Otis Comments (0)  


   messageicon watching football the same way Colin Kaepernick does... sitting on my couch
←Rate | 09-07-2017 21:37 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know what would would solve the whole Kaepernick issue? If only he was a better football player...
←Rate | 08-08-2017 22:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dr: So, how did you dislocate your shoulder? Me: I panicked when the blood pressure machine at the store got tigh- I mean football..
←Rate | 02-02-2017 20:05 by @UncleBSolomon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Patriots are going to the Superbowl....The NFL is going to assign someone to check Tom Brady's balls throughout the game....don't want that on my resume
←Rate | 01-24-2017 08:09 by bob Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just saw Luke Bryan is singing the National Anthem at the Superbowl. So I thought I'd post a preview for everyone....Oh Girl can you see by my pickup's headlights what so proudly we hail on the old dirt road ...
←Rate | 01-23-2017 12:01 by Sharpie Comments (0)  


   messageicon ..... Congratulations Redblacks!!! ...... Wait a minute .... What the heck is a Redblack? ..... Answer: Another Underdog ..... Who just won the Grey Cup!!! ..... OK .... It's the Canadian (People that live north of the US) ..... version of the Superbowl.
←Rate | 11-27-2016 22:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish there were no women football announcers. Isn't there a badminton channel they can get a gig with?
←Rate | 11-18-2016 09:38 by Sheezatayhay Comments (0)  


   messageicon When somebody tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football.
←Rate | 10-15-2016 05:48 Comments (0)  

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