~heZz~ Funny Status Messages

   just opened a store next to 'Forever 21', called 'Finally 22'

   I can remember when he was just Lieutenant Tso...when nobody respected his meat..

   I'd rather shower with my parents than go shopping on Black Friday...

   Vegas has the Ravens as a 9.5 point underdog against the Pats but the Ravens are a 3 body favorite in possible murders.

   Happy Mamacita's Day to all the Senoritas who played for keeps

   Storms can be scary to kids, so I tell my son that thunder is God beating Jesus because he "forgot" to put his toys away.

   On my way to the kid's school... apparently, a nicotine patch is not an appropriate substitute for a band-aid.

   Hey Girl Scouts, let mom handle my cookie transaction. I don't have all day to watch you practice math..

   I'm really starting to get concerned about the lack of seatbelt use on the bangbus..

   The English language is the easiest to learn because even if you get it wrong, so do most of the natives