shoesan Funny Status Messages

   RIP Donna Summer NOW we will never know who left the cake out in the rain

   I'm watching for anyone complaining about the heat. I will copy your post and save it for winter. Then I WILL paste it to your profile with WHO IS HOT NOW when you are buried snow. OH you know who you are!

   Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have a few things I need to confess: I let the dogs out, I stole the cookies from the cookie jar, I hacked play station, I was on Navy Seal Team 6 and YES I did cause global warming.

   When I'm really bored at work I like to write "I'm watching you" on the toilet paper a few squares in just to mess with people.

   Friends are like underwear.... Some crawl up your butt... Some snap under pressure... Some don't have the strength to hold you up... Some get a little twisted... Some are your favorite.Some are cheap & just plain nasty.And some actually do cover your butt

   I get so tired of the same old BS...can't I get a little BS variety?

   ooh lookie my mood ring is a beautiful shade of I dont give a crap

   Whenever someone says "Expect the unexpected" I get the urge to smack them and say "It's not as good as it sounds, is it?"

   American Idol would be more exciting if there was a trap door contestants fell through immediately upon hearing the news of being sent home

   wondering why buy grapes with seeds when the convenience of a seedless grape is right there