Zummerman Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Wanna have a happy relationship? Try switching your gf's lipstick into gluestick!
←Rate | 05-25-2012 13:08 by Zummerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon My phone just autocorrected Volvo to Vulva without me noticing it and now my boss thinks my Vulva is having the dents banged out of it by 3 guys at the body shop! Thank you auto-correct! This day's going to rock!
←Rate | 05-25-2012 07:48 by Zummerman Comments (3)  


   messageicon Good resolutions are like beautiful girls: they are easy to make but hard to keep
←Rate | 04-22-2012 17:13 by Zummerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon US Presidential elections 2012, polls close. "So, Barack, how many votes did you get?" asks his wife Michelle. "Two," he responds. She slaps him hard across the face. "What was that for?" "You have a mistress, now do you!!?"
←Rate | 04-19-2012 23:11 by Zummerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon What occupies the last 6 pages of the Chrysler Car User's Manual? The bus and train schedules....
←Rate | 04-19-2012 23:09 by Zummerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon richardmooney26 is George Zimmerman hiding... nowhere to go.. sh*t to do...
←Rate | 04-09-2012 21:36 by Zummerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Looking For a Truly Romantic & Meaningful Overnight Relationship, please pm my inbox for details...... Midgets, Casey Anthony and Octomom - Don't Bother applying!
←Rate | 03-28-2012 19:33 by Zummerman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Going out on a date with Octomom tonight… Just in case…wearing socks under 3 pairs of condoms…
←Rate | 03-28-2012 19:25 by Zummerman Comments (0)  



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