@TeeWuu86 Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon I wonder if girls at the University of Alabama call their periods the "Crimson Tide"
←Rate | 01-10-2016 20:43 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm doing a water balloon drive by at bestbuy tonight at 23:00 hours...... Whose with me?!?!
←Rate | 11-25-2010 08:20 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Life has no remote. Get up and change it yourself.
←Rate | 10-25-2010 17:44 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (4)  

   messageicon If your dog is the only one excited when you walk in the door from work even though you make 6 figures.......... you have failed conclusively!!!!!
←Rate | 10-24-2010 14:17 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon a fart is merely the cry of an imprisoned turd
←Rate | 10-21-2010 18:12 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Old people tell the best stories.....
←Rate | 10-11-2010 12:04 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Wouldnt ot be nice if breast implants came with a squeaky toy inside them.
←Rate | 10-07-2010 10:24 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (2)  

   messageicon NOTHING is more awkward then walking down an empty hallway and passing someone who you use to talk to but don't anymore.
←Rate | 10-06-2010 19:34 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (3)  

   messageicon I wish I had had Dora's parents . They let her little A$$ go anywhere
←Rate | 10-05-2010 18:29 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Me: Did it hurt? Girl says: What, when I fell out of heaven? Me: No, when you got kicked out of hell for being too hotttt!!
←Rate | 09-30-2010 18:06 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon never run from a fat cop......he won't chase you, but you wont get away either.
←Rate | 09-29-2010 23:35 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I asked my co-worker if he think he's going to Heaven. He said, "Hell yea!"......
←Rate | 09-29-2010 13:35 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Came home & my girlfriend had on my favorite thong. Needless to say I dumped her. No one wears my clothes and gets away with it
←Rate | 09-28-2010 18:46 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Gotta get my ORAL workout: If two witches were watching two watches....then which witch would watch which watch?
←Rate | 09-28-2010 18:46 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon **best way to be noticed in a bank** EVERYBODY FREEZE!....did anybody else feel that earthquake?
←Rate | 09-27-2010 11:24 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why would you want a camera on the iPad? That's like taking pictures with a clipboard!
←Rate | 09-26-2010 14:46 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I love the way you laugh....mostly because your boobs jiggle when you do :)
←Rate | 09-25-2010 14:08 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help. .... So I hired a hitman
←Rate | 09-25-2010 13:21 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon My Idea for a church bulletin. "Stop, drop, and roll won't work in hell ."
←Rate | 09-25-2010 13:18 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Hows about you give me your number while I'm still interested.
←Rate | 09-25-2010 13:16 by @TeeWuu86 Comments (0)  


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