@ComedyAndTruths Funny Status Messages

   My dream job is to be that guy at the mall who plays with those remote controlled helicopters all day.

   I'm going to cover my entire body in bacon so I can become more desirable.

   Your body should be a temple, not an amusement park.

   Finding a true friend is about as easy as nailing jello to a tree.

   I could really use some TLC.....Tacos Laced with Cocaine.

   A woman with big boobs will never truly know if she's actually interesting.