Starman Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Now days crappy guys only want one thing from a woman. Back in the old days, they wanted them to also do the dishes and keep house.
←Rate | 01-09-2020 18:25 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Selling homing pigeons is a lucrative, and well return business.
←Rate | 01-10-2020 20:50 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey if you think buying condoms is awkward, try returning them.
←Rate | 01-10-2020 22:06 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon This year my mother gave my son a drum set for Christmas. Which surprised me. I said to her don't you remember how you hated it when I played the drums when I was a kid? She replyed with a smile , I remember.
←Rate | 01-11-2020 19:06 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Here is a way to get rid of your unwanted junk. Pack it in an Amazon box, and place it on the porch.
←Rate | 01-11-2020 19:31 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just about all husbands lie on their tax returns by listing them self as head of household.
←Rate | 01-12-2020 22:05 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're fat when you only need a cup of water in the tub when taking a bath.
←Rate | 01-13-2020 00:29 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon The batteries in my electric toothbrush died before I finished. I've never smpathized more with women in my life.
←Rate | 01-16-2020 04:04 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I don't think I can get through a day without my middle finger."
←Rate | 01-17-2020 20:16 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon "It doesn't bother me that my wife goes out to play BINGO every night. It's the coming back home part that does.
←Rate | 01-18-2020 22:11 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon "A trail of clothes leading up to a bedroom before marriage ment a night of pashionate love making. Now it means you dropped them on your way from the dryer.
←Rate | 01-24-2020 22:59 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the judge told Mickey he couldn't grant his divorce from Minnie just because you say she crazy. Mickey said, I didn't say she crazy..... I said she's f***ing Goofy.
←Rate | 01-24-2020 23:28 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon "If during your medical exam your doctor says I need to google this...... It's time to get a new doctor."
←Rate | 01-25-2020 00:12 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Marriage is the main cause of divorce.
←Rate | 01-28-2020 02:48 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dilemma: Watching your mother inlaw driving towards a cliff in your brand new car.
←Rate | 01-29-2020 20:38 by STARMAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do wives think giving their husband the silent treatment is a punishment.
←Rate | 01-31-2020 23:17 by STARMAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I'm not at home and my wife is giving me the silent treatment, she'll send me blank tex messages.
←Rate | 01-31-2020 23:25 by STARMAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're fat when your dog lays down in your shaddow on hot sunny days.
←Rate | 02-02-2020 14:26 by STARMAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon YAY! Mr. Peanut back.
←Rate | 02-02-2020 19:54 by STARMAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon Had one of those DNA test done. Turns out I'm related to Adam and Eve.
←Rate | 02-13-2020 23:16 by STARMAN Comments (0)  



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