MG Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
←Rate | 02-06-2010 06:37 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do men get their great ideas in bed? Because they are plugged into a genius.
←Rate | 02-06-2010 13:02 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Surprise n shock as A KILLER whale kills a highly trained animal trainer! Duh! killer!
←Rate | 02-24-2010 19:21 by MG Comments (1)  


   messageicon REMEMBER IN FAT AND SLIM: F - STANDS FOR FOOD AND S - FOR STARVATION
←Rate | 02-25-2010 08:16 by MG Comments (1)  


   messageicon I went to buy a pair of camouflage pants, I couldn't find any!
←Rate | 02-25-2010 09:19 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon The difference between a sin and shame; It is a sin to put it in; It is a shame to pull it out!
←Rate | 02-26-2010 06:02 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Acute Gout Attack!! - The Vegetarian's Revenge!
←Rate | 02-27-2010 03:54 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whoever coined the phrase "Quiet as a mouse" has never stepped on one.
←Rate | 03-04-2010 11:56 by MG Comments (1)  


   messageicon living the dream, one nightmare at a time.
←Rate | 03-04-2010 21:01 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Dear Mother Nature: If you stop the cold and the snow and the wind I promise to stop calling you a whore."
←Rate | 03-04-2010 21:04 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon believes the difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'
←Rate | 03-04-2010 21:07 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon DNA: National Dyslexic Association
←Rate | 03-06-2010 05:46 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I wake up GRUMPY; other times I let her sleep.
←Rate | 03-06-2010 05:47 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: “Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?” To which the farmer replied: “Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!”
←Rate | 03-06-2010 06:16 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon doesn't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
←Rate | 03-06-2010 17:11 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon   Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B.C.!!!
←Rate | 03-14-2010 21:05 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face
←Rate | 03-15-2010 15:32 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was?
←Rate | 03-16-2010 10:35 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had a fight with the wife and didn't see her for three days... Then the swelling went down and I could see her out of one eye
←Rate | 03-17-2010 07:28 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage.
←Rate | 03-17-2010 10:54 by MG Comments (0)  


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