J.D. Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Hummmmmmm Chocolate - (Homer Voice)
←Rate | 12-18-2012 10:05 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Last night I slept for eight hours straight. Then two hours gay.
←Rate | 12-25-2012 09:38 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet Billy Mays is up in Heaven partying like its $19.99
←Rate | 12-25-2012 09:38 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon RIP 2012 (2012-2012)
←Rate | 01-01-2013 23:42 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Our economy would probably be much better if people only spent less time using facebook during work hours!!!
←Rate | 01-03-2013 20:54 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon bored? send a text to a random number that says "I hid the body" what's next boss?
←Rate | 01-08-2013 12:06 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fun things to do in Walmart: Take the ''try me'' stickers off of the toys & place them on condom boxes.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 14:21 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon 9 months before I was born, I went to a party with my dad, and left with my mom.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 14:26 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? Look for The Fresh Prints.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 14:28 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women will get botox, wax their legs, pierce their nipples and clit, pluck their eyebrows...but they won't do anal because THAT hurts?
←Rate | 02-01-2013 11:25 by J.D. Comments (1)  


   messageicon A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he's finished.
←Rate | 02-01-2013 11:25 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it. :p
←Rate | 02-01-2013 11:26 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon when I am bored, I like to park on the side of the freeway and stick a blow dryer out the window and watch the cars slam on their brakes
←Rate | 02-06-2013 11:36 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you ran like your mouth, you’d be in good shape!
←Rate | 02-06-2013 11:37 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Commitment doesn't scare me, the thought of committing to the wrong person does.
←Rate | 02-21-2013 11:36 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't forget Comic Relief this year. Just £5 can help a disabled African learn the difference between an intruder and his f**king girlfriend
←Rate | 02-25-2013 22:22 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Because I'm stressed I've started sniffing glue. It's the only thing holding me together
←Rate | 02-25-2013 22:24 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook = Poor mans therapist...
←Rate | 03-12-2013 19:58 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only at Mcdonalds do they say,"Sorry about your wait" and really mean "weight."
←Rate | 03-18-2013 10:18 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm going to take a shot for every "like" I get on this status....then again....I'm taking shots whether you b*stards like it or not.
←Rate | 03-18-2013 16:18 by J.D. Comments (0)  



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