Dopey420 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
←Rate | 01-10-2011 22:58 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and I. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a b!tch.
←Rate | 01-10-2011 23:26 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.
←Rate | 01-10-2011 23:33 by Dopey420 Comments (1)  


   messageicon why do all the new smartphones have porn on them? Who in their right mind is out in public thinking, "ya know i'd really like to jerk off right now"?
←Rate | 01-18-2011 09:33 by dopey420 Comments (3)  


   messageicon They should make a more honest name for 16 and Pregnant. Stupid Little Girls sounds good to me.
←Rate | 01-19-2011 10:46 by Dopey420 Comments (2)  


   messageicon According to a new survey, 40% of adults in Mexico say they would move to the United States if they got a chance. The number would have been higher, but the other 60% already live here.
←Rate | 01-19-2011 11:32 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I come from a small town whose population never changed. Each time a woman got pregnant, someone left town.
←Rate | 01-20-2011 06:46 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 57. Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed
←Rate | 01-20-2011 06:53 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love to give homemade gifts. Which one of my kids do you want?
←Rate | 01-20-2011 09:57 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
←Rate | 01-22-2011 17:33 by Dopey420 Comments (1)  


   messageicon What's six inches long, two and a half inches wide, and drives women wild?................................. Money
←Rate | 01-23-2011 11:16 by Dopey420 Comments (4)  


   messageicon Baby,baby,baby ooh!" Mom: *walks in* Are you listening to justin bieber AGAIN..? Daughter: No I'm watchin PORN... Mom: Oh thank God
←Rate | 01-23-2011 11:18 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stalking is such a strong word. I prefer extreme follow the leader :)
←Rate | 01-24-2011 08:15 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown BUT it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bi**h slap them!
←Rate | 01-25-2011 12:35 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ˙ǝןƃuɐ ʇuǝɹǝɟɟıp ɐ ɯoɹɟ pןɹoʍ ǝɥʇ ʇɐ ʞooן ɐ ƃuıʞɐʇ sı
←Rate | 01-25-2011 13:07 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ⓘ ⓦⓐⓢ ⓑⓞⓡⓔⓓ, ⓢⓞ ⓘ ⓓⓔ©ⓘⓓⓔⓓ ⓣⓞ ⓟⓤⓣ ⓛⓔⓣⓣⓔⓡⓢ ⓘⓝⓢⓘⓓⓔ ⓑⓤⓑⓑⓛⓔⓢ.
←Rate | 01-25-2011 13:10 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Little Johnny wrote to Santa, "I want a baby brother for christmas." Santa wrote back' "Send me your Mother. '
←Rate | 01-25-2011 13:24 by Dopey420 Comments (20)  


   messageicon A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
←Rate | 01-25-2011 16:19 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?
←Rate | 01-25-2011 16:22 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
←Rate | 01-25-2011 16:39 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


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