jitneyman Funny Status Messages

   What do you call a gay driveby......................A fruit roll-up!!!

   I asked "Alexa, what do women want" This thing havent shut up for three days now

   Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.

   if I ever get down on one knee and propose to a girl and she says "No" I'm coming back up with a uppercut like Street Fighter!...."haaaadduuikkickkkk!"

   I went to google and type in "let it snow" and snow started falling. So I typed "let it rain" and the strippers started falling to the floor.

   You know you back in Miami, when You pull up to a light and a Bum throws a quarter at you.