Lozo Funny Status Messages

   Driving on the highway a guy walking on the side of the road gave me a thumbs up I guess he liked my car.

   Never trust a skinny chef

   Everybody loves pot brownies. But I bring crystal meth cupcakes to a party, suddenly I'm the weirdo.

   Face your problems,Don't Facebook them!

   Ghetto word of the day : Omelet I shoulda slapped da fu*k outta yo a$$ but omelet dat sh!t slide dis time! 

   What's the objective for Jewish football......To get the quarterback!

   My sleep number is a fat blunt

   A cat falls in a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story...A wet pu$$y makes a c0ck happy..

   The akward moment when you say n!gga in front of a black person

   Facebook starting drama since 2004.

   Good girls go to heaven, but bad girls go everywhere

   Did you eat a bowl of frosted flakes this morning ? Cause you look GRRRREEAATT

   Damn girl your skinny! I rolled blunts fatter then you but you've been passed around more!

   Did anyone else get prompted for payment for facebook?

   My sleep number is 2...bong rips

   125 shot of nitrous is like a hot chick with STD's.... You know you wanna hit it but your afraid of the consequences!

   Deadliest catch, without the crabs, we're almost out of gas, call the Arabs!

   If a red headed man works at a bakery, Does that make him a gingerbread man?

   I almost tripped over a Parking stop and a little old lady says "Do you want my cane?" Very funny old lady.