Jsabbage Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Why do speed walkers look like kids who are told not to run around the pool?
←Rate | 06-03-2018 14:11 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ask a meteorologist who will win the Superbowl......then go with the other team ;-)
←Rate | 01-27-2019 11:03 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Unemployment, COVID-19, social unrest, .......kinda makes waiting for that giraffe to give birth not that big of a big deal now.
←Rate | 06-12-2020 14:02 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ever picked up a copy of your x-ray from the doctors office, open the envelope when you get to the car, hold it up to the light and say....."yeah, I have no clue what I'm looking at"?
←Rate | 06-08-2018 14:47 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've never Kung Fu kicked so many toilet seats in all my life.
←Rate | 03-11-2020 18:31 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon My 10 year old: Lands 14 platsic water bottle flips in a row, can't hit laundry basket with dirty socks.
←Rate | 05-16-2018 18:29 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wonder if dogs ever wake up in the morning and think "dear god please don't take me jogging with you today"?
←Rate | 05-25-2018 19:37 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Builds elaborate structures while playing Fortnite. Can't make own bed in real life.
←Rate | 11-16-2018 21:00 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon The night before the kids go back to school is the grown ups version of Christmas Eve.
←Rate | 09-02-2019 20:47 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Weather forecasters have identified yet another tropical depression in the Atlantic Region which could potentially grow into a mega storm of epic proportions. The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has appropriately named it Common Core Math
←Rate | 09-12-2018 14:33 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know what they paid Tom Hanks to be the conductor on the Polar Express, but I've been on the bus during local school field trips and he ain't making near enough money.
←Rate | 11-30-2018 22:06 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon I could easily do all my Christmas shopping at the Cracker Barrel gift shop.
←Rate | 12-21-2019 11:51 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon In unrelated news Julian Edleman and Tom Brady have just checked in to couples therapy...
←Rate | 02-22-2019 12:19 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Successfully "lands" a water bottle flip 3 out of 5 attempts. 0-998 in making his socks to the dirty clothes basket.
←Rate | 12-05-2018 10:26 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy 32nd birthday to "Top Gun". need4speed
←Rate | 05-16-2018 11:37 by Jsabbage Comments (0)  



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