Yojimbo Funny Status Messages

   Justin Bieber the only daughter that Mr. & Mrs. Bieber have?

   Lindsay Lohan...on the next Dog the Bounty Hunter?

   I miss Gary Coleman, I grew up with him...he just never did.

   it just me...or does Muammar Gaddafi looked like Mickey Rourke?

   remember when cops really wanted to PROTECT and SERVE and teachers really wanted to EDUCATE children? I miss the 1800's

   A school in Kentucky is going to start teaching the Bible in the class room.....yea that's great...but I didn't know anyone in Kentucky knew how to read.

   A t.v. christian dating site commercial : Hey Christians, want to be in a meaningful relationship? ...whoa whoa whoa...arent they IN a MEANINGFUL relationship...with GOD?

   My grandma and your grandma were sitting by the fire, my grandma pushed your grandma right in the fire...that's just how she rolls.

   man falls out of a deer stand and dies...and people say...he died doing what he loved to do....which was falling out of trees?

   I thought I saw ZZ Top at Wal-Mart today...turns out it was just 3 women from Kentucky.

   Charlie Sheen wants 10 million for a tell all book.....or a kilo of blow.

   On my tombstone I'm going to pout...preheat oven to 400 degrees...none will get it though.

   Ophrah needs to hang with Jennifer Hudson

   WOW!!!! Kirk Douglas looks better then Larry King.

   NEW GAMESHOW : I'm more socially functional then a homeschool kid.

   Wonder if Ben Affleck and the AFLAC Duck are related?

   I just bought the NEW Charlie Sheen viewmaster...it flips all by itself..crickets..crickets..