Chuck Norris Sayings (beta)

There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 13:13 Comments (0)

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the f*ck down.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 13:12 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:59 Comments (0)

If you want a list of Chuck Norris’ enemies, just check the extinct species list.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:58 Comments (0)

Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:57 Comments (0)

When asked what type of vehicle he drives, Chuck Norris responded slyly with "Don't you mean what kind of vehicle drives me?"

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:55 Comments (0)

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:52 Comments (0)

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this mans blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a roundhouse kick.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:43 by roflol Comments (0)

BREAKING NEWS: Chuck Norris' ass whooped by Sandy.

Submitted: 10-29-2012 10:59 Comments (0)

I am going to watch the debate with Chuck Norris tonight, I just hope Obama doesn't say anything stupid so Chuck doesn't kick my TV in, Oh but Obama will. . .

Submitted: 10-22-2012 19:10 Comments (0)

Congratulations Felix Baumgartner! But I heard Chuck Norris jumped from 130,000 feet....without the suit!

Submitted: 10-14-2012 14:34 by Massena43 Comments (0)

Enjoying a liquid lunch with Chuck Norris.

Submitted: 10-12-2012 12:05 Comments (0)

It's so COLD outside. If my nipples were any harder, even Chuck Norris wouldn't mess with em!!!

Submitted: 10-10-2012 05:13 by Sorrel Comments (0)

This status is Chuck Norris approved.

Submitted: 09-11-2012 14:07 by Ishnae Comments (0)

Jesus may have been able to walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Submitted: 08-18-2012 04:16 by The Chuckinator Comments (0)

FACT_ Chuck Norris was born May 6, 1945 and the 'Nazis' surrendered on May 7, 1945.

Submitted: 08-15-2012 14:37 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris said go to youtube.com/werefamoustrickshots and sub or hes gonna hurt you

Submitted: 08-04-2012 06:33 by fts pure Comments (0)

DO THIS NOW: Type “find Chuck Norris” into Google and hit “I’m feeling lucky”

Submitted: 07-27-2012 23:30 by Gee Comments (0)

Chuck Norris likes his meat so rare that he only eats unicorns.

Submitted: 07-25-2012 02:31 by 1568 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris has been to Mars, that is why there is no life there

Submitted: 06-17-2012 16:03 Comments (0)